Good fit. Good mood

One of the best feelings for me is a good pair of quality blue jeans. They just feel so good to put on, to strut my stuff in, and to especially wear with socks and sandal heel wedges.

you may be thinking socks and sandals? I swear its cute. :)

I have wide hips and a thin waist- so in order to have the legs fit my thighs appropriately i am usually drowning in the waist section....so thank goodness for belts.

This recent pair fits me so good- and it puts me in a good mood whenever i wear them. which is about 3 times a weeek since i have no time and hate doing laundry.

please don't pay attention to my messy room in the background. Give me a break it's finals time...this has also been the reason for my absence. school school school.

what brand of jeans are your favorite?

A Purple Balloon

On Saturday it marked the 1 year anniversary of the death of a friend.

A balloon release was held- purple balloons; for domestic violence awareness.

I was not able to go to the gathering where everyone was releasing balloons, so I bought my own and wrote a message on it to her.

I don't even think you know how much someone can impact your life until they are gone.

Image: Balloon Release by Dann Gammekk

I went out to a place in the street at dusk...trying to be away from power lines etc., as i let go and watched it soar up ward, I couldn't help but wonder.. is she gonna get it? where is this balloon really going? scientifically speaking it will get to a certain altitude and pop.

But that explanation is too simple for me, I knew in my heart that it would float up to her.

EXCEPT...

Some wind came and blew it into a tree.

At first i started to tear up, walked back in the house with my head down, feeling pretty dumb, but then i kind of started to laugh.

I mean honestly, that is pretty funny. Nick told me she sent that wind to make it blow into the tree... to make me laugh. to start off my night with a smile. Its like she knew i needed a good laugh.

I was nervous to have some cocktails this night, i didn't want to get emotional, but it turned out to be one of the most fun nights i've had all semester. I can't help but think it was due to the beginning of my night, and the light heartedness of the balloon incidence.

Things don't always go the way you plan, but you adapt to the change,and make the best of it.

Halloween

Halloween time is always an interesting time of the year. About 1 month of this semester left.

Nick and I were Juno and Bleeker from the movie "Juno"- honestly many people truly thought i was pregnant..

Nick even got congratulated in class this morning on becoming a father. It was such a fun costume- warm and comfortable.

Had such a fun weekend with my friends.

Back to a hard week of school. Trying to finish strong.

How do you guys stay motivated this time of year? With thanksgiving coming up, and Christmas shopping beginning?... I just want finals to be over with- (and i want to ace them)... is that too much to ask?

Work Out Diva

You guys probably won't believe me when I say that I am going to stick to my new work out plan.....

That's okay because I have a hard time believing it myself. But with this new found attitude I think I will have a higher rate of compliance.

If i miss a day (or 2)... I'm not going to beat myself up over it, I always have the mind set "Oh well i already missed 2 days, 1 more won't hurt." And that goes for everything. If i have 1 oreo...well that just messed up my eating healthy for the day might as well go to Dairy Queen for dinner. Anyways, i'm optimistic about my new work out routine :)

I have the day off from clinicals and class, however I am going to be cramming out this 6 page paper I haven't started, as well as studying for a test I have on Thursday..

And I will probably take a quick break to run to the thrift store to find some last minute things for my halloween costume. :) Can't wait to show you all what or who I am going to be!

ps- i make the best caramel corn. Let's just say in a house of 4 college girls- It didn't last long.

Tahh Tahh

Insignificant

Sometimes I feel so insignificant.

It is good and bad. It relieves stress, but at the same time makes you feel belittled in the big scheme of it all.

I often feel this way while looking out into the stars, the ocean, a big city skyline.

{photo credit: m.fellegy} *click to enlarge*

What makes you feel insignificant?

Wedding Party v.3 [mmz]

I met Megan freshman year of college. We didn't become that close until sophomore year when we became roommates.

Our favorite memories are from when we lived together. We went on many adventures together, including picking up a cat from some sketchy farm in Wisconsin. I honestly don't even want to share a lot of stories. I think that some are special that just stay between me and Meg.

Like the time Meg played piano in an old dorm meeting hall, while I sang and danced, or that gorgeous red and black checkered couch we picked up in the worst blizzard of the winter.

The countless nights of getting ready together. Spending new years together is also another wonderful memory I have.

Megan and I were inseperable during the summer of 2010.

Even though we have been seperated by distance the last year and a half since i had to move for the nursing program, I still feel inseperable from her.

One of the lasts nights of this summer me, meg, nick and cody sat outside enjoying cocktails at a restaurant that used to be an old train station and just talked. The thing i most enjoyed about that night is that yes we did look back on fond memories, but mostly we talked about the present and the future.

I met Nick because of Megan. To be honest, I don't know if i would have ever met Nick if I hadn't become friends with Megan.

We helped each other through all the drama that comes with college, school, relationships, missing our family, looking back at high school memories, wondering how our lives would end up.

Megan is my best friend. And I could never and would never get married without her standing on my side.

Megan, you introduced me to my husband, to my other best friend, to my soul mate. I am eternally grateful.

Even though this past year has been hard, and our friendship has changed... it really hasn't changed. You are still my best friend. The one I run to, the one i know that will tip my chin up and say "hey, stop, you have me, we'll figure it out."

Can't wait for all the memories to come. :)

King Harry

As some of you know I was a foster parent to the most amazing dog in the world. His name was "rascal" but, after i drove him home from the humane society, my car was covered in hair.

Hence the name King Harry. (harry=hairy.)

I think of this boy often. I miss how happy he made me when i was stressed with school.

It is hard when I want him back so bad, but he now has a new home. Someday I hope Nick and I can have a dog as great as King Harry.

You know how they say you never forget your first love?

Well i think this is true.

King Harry was the first dog true dog that I considered mine that I ever loved.

Our first picture together.... just getting to know one another

This is kind of an out of the blue post. But its strange isn't it?

How we sometimes can't remember what we did, what was said, or how the day went... but you never forget how you felt whether it was good or bad.

I look back at these pictures and I can barely remember how is bark sounded. Things i do remember is how excited and happy he was to see me after class and how i felt the same way when i saw him.

reciprocal happiness.

In other words, i miss him.

I miss his cute prance/hop when he walked.
I miss his whimper.
I miss how he smelt.
I miss having his hair on all my clothes.
I miss my study buddy.
I miss how happy he made me.

I hate the feeling of missing.

King Harry you will always be my favorite.

Beauty in the breakdown.

^^ Play button. Artist: Frou Frou


Break down number 1 of the semester.

I can't do it all. I can't be everything. I can't make everybody happy. I can't be "perfect".

What a beautiful and humbling life lesson that hit me tonight.

Finding comfort in the ones who I love and who love me.

It doesn't matter what lead up to this, or what is to follow. But in the here and now, all we have is each other..My heart sings of thanks to God for putting certain people in my life.

Quote from ps i love you... {It is true.. ultimately we are alone in this world, but if we are all alone, then we're all together in that too.}

I heard myself saying to Nick "I feel like I have no control"

It hit me.. I shouldn't have control. I should be placing my trust in God. Why do i feel the need to control everything in my life?

That places a lot of pressure on myself. Unnecessary pressure.

Letting go....

2 words..

Why isn't it simpler to just let go?...

Free fall into my future with complete trust.

To have faith that it will all be ok.

Faith. It truly is a gift. One that i have been praying God will instill upon my heart. To have no reservations.

a tuesday night.
a twenty-one year old.
a few tears shed.
a few prayers sent upwards.
a breakdown.
a beautiful realization.

I know tomorrow i won't wake up a new person, or completely changed by tonight's events.

It will be a process.
An adventure.

I can't do it all. I can't be everything. I can't make everybody happy. I can't be perfect.

I will stumble. I will fall.

What is important is that i get back up.

There truly is beauty in the breakdown...

1950's

Jean Patchett and Jayne Mansfield have been inspiring me so much this past month.

I go through such different phases of styles that i adore. The classy chic, red lipstick and pearls look has such an elegance to it.

I got many looks when i styled my hair like this, and had on red lipstick and high lighted the mole by my lower lip. It seems that some people think the 1950's should stay in the 1950's.. I for one think why not take the best of each era and make into something your own.

I feel i am at a constant battle with my hair. I haven't found one style that i truly love and fits me. It is very frustrating, because lets face it- its all about the hair. (well and the face.)

I sometimes think its not even so much the style that i love, but the composure and behaviors that come along with the fashion. It is not good for a pretty lady to speak obscene words, to belch, you want to behave "properly." I get too laid back once in awhile, and i love to refresh my soul and be lady like: i feel better about myself. Not based on the clothes, but how they make me a better person.

There is nothing wrong with a woman having manners, and dressing conservatively in today's society. I for one, feel more beautiful, confident and respectable when i am in a turtle neck than in a low cut shirt. Maybe i don't fit in this generation.. I dream of horse and carriages often, going to opera's and plays instead of to night clubs.Sometimes dreams are better than reality.

Lets be real folks. I listen to Benny Goodman& his orchestra and Aaron Zigman.

But i am happy here as well because Nick is here. I guess God has a reason he put me where i am.

Which era do you feel you belong in?

Last Firsts.

I am a senior in college- in case you didn't know.

Remember in high school all the lasts? The last lunch, the last dance, the last pep rally etc..

I am trying not to think about all the lasts, but it is hard. My friends here are my family. And everything i do with them is bittersweet, knowing it'll be the last first football game i attend as a student.

Here is a dorky picture of me and Nick :) {is it possible to love someone this much?}

It is all bitter sweet. This is going to be one of the best years of my life. But it is going to fly by, and after all is said and done- we will graduate and go seperate ways.

However, i have a sense of comfort, I know that my close group of friends and I will remain friends for life. Even if I don't get to see them every day, or every month, I know that every time we meet for whatever, it'll make it that much more special when i do get to see them.

I am sad about the lasts, but i am so excited for all my firsts with Nick as a married couple.

Did a Zombie bar crawl last night with mah besties.....lets just say we "killed" it.
random tid bid i wanted to share.

Thank you to all my close friends in Winona. I love all of you always. You are family. You know who you are.

Sincerely,
Me.

(booo its Sunday. bleh.)

M loves N.

It is weird being so in love you that everything else falls to the wayside of that.

I always get annoyed when people only talk about their significant other, but sometimes you have to or you feel like your heart will explode. I can say that I have expectations of what marriage will be like, a partnership,spending your life with your best friend, your all in all. For better or worse.

In the midst of planning, after our first meeting with Father Tony, he is starting to make me realize more what a wedding is and what it is not. It is a vow, a commitment to another person, committing your life, and committing that relationship to God. Yes it is fun to plan the colors, and dresses, and food, and etc. a wedding is 1 day, a marriage is a life time. It is important to not have an over the top ceremony, secular music, and other things even as simple as flowers, from taking the attention away from the truly amazing sacrament of marriage.

It has made me re-think about having a flower girl, or an aisle runner etc.. A runner was used back in the day becuase churches had dirt floors, and obviously the bride wore white to symbolize purity, so the dress could not get dirty before reaching the alter.

I hope through out these next few months i don't place importance on the societal focus of marriage (invitations, gourmet food, party favors.) and i am able to put the focus on mine and nick's communication skills and compromise through planning this wedding, in order to better our relationship together and with God for our marriage.


After all, the best things in life are not things.

May you all not get swept away by the societal influences of today.

Happy Friday :)

Click

Here are some images from my grandparents house. On Saturday we had a family picture, and lunch. We had the perfect weather for it- its so nice how everyone can come together for one day, other than on a holiday. The only one who couldn't make it was my brother.

Anna :)

Odie

Grandparents with all their grandchildren.

Girls.

Boys.

Mum and me.

My beautiful parents.

Grandma's homegrown watttamellon.

After eating lunch, Nick came and spent some time with all of the family, its so cute how the little girls just love him. Anna held his hand and when i say "hand" i mean 2 of his fingers because her hands are so tiny.

Went out for burgers at the BlueNote with Nick, watched tv. Sunday morning we toured our reception venue, and had a 2 hour pre-marital counseling session. It couldn't have been a more perfect weekend.

Makes me so eager to graduate and marry Nick and have our own place, and just be together, and live together, and eat every meal together, and go shopping for groceries together.

I don't feel I deserve to be this happy. Why me? {funny how we ask that question in both good situations and bad situations..we can never just accept it.}

Bitter sweet day 9/11. On my drive back to school, flags were hung on every overpass over the highway, along the highway, every buisness had one flying high. We will never forget.

God Bless you all.

Martinieeze

My new favorite thing...happy hour downtown, dressing up with my girls, and talking over a drink or 2. Thursday night we decided on 300 First...

Our selections were the Smokin' Martinis. Pomegranante, Flir-tini, and Color me red. They put dry ice in the bottom of your drink, so it smokes and bubbles for about 5 minutes. There was a warning {do not drink beverage fast or "chug" it, if dry ice is consumed your throat will be burnt}

Lets just say i took just wittle baby sips for a long time, i'm a very cautious person.

Not to mention the great California rolls we had. (similiar to sushi;crab,rice,peppers,onions,seaweed, orange cream sauce.)

After, we went to meet up with some friends at a local pub and we watched the Saints VS Packers game. I love football. Jersey, leggings, my minnetonka moccasin fringe boots: whats better than that?

Sept. 21st is officially the last day of summer, but i say fall is already here.

From Martini's to Pumpkin Spiced Latte's.

Have a lovely friday, and a great weekend! I'm headed home for a family picture, meeting with our reception facility to talk catering/decorations etc. and pre-marital counseling on Sunday.

Too much success...

I had way too much success at the thrift store...

I will share with you my favorite item i purchased today. For only $3.99.

I urge you all to be patient and humble. Good things take time. And paying full price isn't necessary (most of the time.) Thrift away. My total bill was about 50 bucks...i got a pair of white capris, a dress, 2 sweaters, 3 shirts, 2 pairs of shoes, and white vintage plates....ooo and an old pot. Too much success can be a bad thing. Good thing my addiction is thrift stores and not Coach stores.

One thing my parents always taught me: Live within your means.

Loveeee.

{i love shoes.}

Latest style icon: Isabel Lucas

Isabel Lucas.

I love her style. I think the saying you wear the clothes, don't let the clothes wear you stands true in her case.

Probably doesn't help that she is gorgeous. I can't wait to go thrifting tomorrow. Hope to find some dish ware, retro dresses, and who knows what else :)

Who inspires you?

Labor Day Weekend Jibberish

Helloooooo.

I miss blogging so much. I miss taking pictures. I miss venting to everyone. I miss sharing my thoughts.

What i DON'T want is for this blog to:
-become school focused
-to be a chore instead of a pleasure
-to be only complaints
-to upload pointless photos (that is what facebook is for)

What i DO want is for this blog to:
-be an outlet to share my hopes and fears of my final year of college
-my thoughts about balancing relationships with friends, family and God while having a fiance, being a full time student, and working part time.
-to share photos of my life that have impacted me.
-to inspire others to do what they love
-to share my mistakes with others, so they can learn from them

* Quick saturday night thoughts on labor day weekend:

Week 1: Inquiry

This first week back at school has been overwhelming, exciting etc..

Thursday night me and about 40 of my nursing classmates went to ladies night at an irish pub.

It turned up being a very eventful night filled with many girls falling while dancing, tumbling down a flight of stairs, russian men abducting people, and a 40 dollar cab ride.

It was so worth it.

Worked last night, and today is gym, meeting nick for lunch, library, and work again.

Tomorrow- STATEFAIR!

Wedding planning is at a hault for now. But we have up coming meetings with our parish priest, and RCIA leaders.

Cheers to the weekend.

Back to Reality

School has started. Mondays suck, class from 9am-5pm {with an hour for lunch}

blah.

So great to see my friends again, the 6 of us girls sat outside on my deck, grilled, talked about our summer, and gossiped. Enjoyed ice cream, and then heading inside after the sunset to have a glass of wine and watch Kate plus 8.

:)

Feels good to be back. But ready to focus and get through it so i can "start" my life with Nick. Even though i have realized it has already begun.

I am so blessed.

Chicago

Early morning coffe- headin' to our hotel

Farmers market... mmmm :)

At crown fountains cooling off.

Enjoying shopping, eating churros and walking along the pier.

Chicago style hot dogs and basquing in the sun at millenium park.

We had an amazing time and made many great memories. It was the perfect ending to my summer. Now to finish up this last year of college, graduate, pass my board exam, and marry the most amazing boy. Yep, this is gonna be a good year.

Class tomorrow at 9 am.

Laundry is just about done, then for grocery shopping and getting school supplies.

Have a wonderful Sunday evening everyone!

Trendy Tuesday

Helloooo. So school starts on monday, fall is just around the corner and wedding planning is in full swing. I am not sure if i'll be able to continue Trendy Tuesday during the school year, seeing as i am in term 3 of nursing. {supposedly the hardest term} But i'll play it by ear and see what happens.

Early morning photo sesh with m.h., then i am packing and heading to chicago for a few days with my fiance. :)

Can't wait to share photos from Chicago with everyone when i get back! Have a fun safe week as we all return to school and continue on with our adventures.

5:00 a.m.

There is something about being up before the sun that has a calmness. The world seems quiet and enjoyable. No noise, just crickets and the wind. A few very early morning birds chirp, and my room is light by a dull lamp.

And then there is me. A 21 year old woman, soon to be nurse and wife, trying to make sense of it all.

Love Doesn't Wait.

Nick and I have been doing a lot of thinking about our Wedding. We had originally planned on May of 2013 {a year from when we graduate} but living back at home, and living away from each other for the 3rd year in a row just didn't sound appealing. We have contacted my church and other reception venues and are trying to find a date that works at the end of next July/ early August.

It is crazy to think that i went from having over a year and half, to now under a year to plan. I have never felt more excited happy and anxious for a day to come. We had thought about it all summer, and it feels like the right thing for us. Stay tuned for the official Wedding date. :)

Trendy Tuesday

Tuesday Snoozeday. Slept in and went to pizza hut with my boy. After we watched breaking bad, did a photo shoot and relaxed with our windows and door open. It is a beautiful cool breeze flowing through our little apartment.

When i found these shoes at the thrift store for 2 dollars. I had to truly think to myself, do i think these are "grandma" shoes or are they actually cute?. I concluded cute, but when i met with my grandma in the cities she told me she had a pair that was the exact same. HA.

My photographer for the day :) [he is a cutie isn't he?] Trying to figure out my new 35 mm camera from 1984.

Stomach beauty mark {beauty mark sounds prettier then mole.}

The rest of the night involves wedding planning. We have some big decisions to make. Including moving the wedding to next summer. We contacted some venues for the reception site today. Making a pros and cons list is very helpful. Happy breezy cool summer day.

Bye!

Weekend Sheenanigans

Worked, then went to uptown to spend the day with my maid of kittens.

I love thrifting with Jill. We are both broke, so it is fun to really hunt for deals.

Cheeeeeze burger earrings- (a must buy)

Dinner at Pepitos :)

Hope everyone had a fabulous weekend! Me and Nick both have off tomorrow and will be spending the day planning the wedding and getting organized.